Table of contents:
- Why does everyone want to know
- Signs of the phenomenon2
- The Cat Principle 3
- She has bouts of aggression
- Friends and their privileges5
- Doubts and couples6
Video: Is This Love? How To Understand That You Really Love A Person?
People like tough questions. How to understand that you really love a person? No article or book will give an exact answer to this. If you could take a blood test, and determine what you are experiencing by the level of hormones and other substances, it would be much easier. Love is a beautiful modern myth and a necessary condition for a normal strong relationship at the same time. After all, no one will share a mortgage with a stranger, get up early under the screams of a child, and the need to save on everything, right?
The content of the article
- 1 Why does everyone want to know this
- 2 Signs of the phenomenon
- 3 The cat principle
- 4 She has bouts of aggression!
- 5 Friends and their privileges
- 6 Doubts and couples
Why does everyone want to know
People who ask how to understand that you really love a person usually don't want to know at all. To cynically paraphrase, they are trying to figure out if they should get into the relationship. The modern world of the young is arranged in such a way that it is really easier for one to survive. There is no need to spend money on some kind of "healthy food" for your other half or try to maintain a "normal life".
Pasta, cheap sausages, and chemical peach-flavored yogurt are good for a start. And at home you can wear your underwear, and you don't have to cook every day. Evenings are free, you can do anything from part-time jobs to active social life.
Having lived for several years without a relationship, a person begins to appreciate the taste of freedom:
- Spend money only on yourself;
- Finally get a dog or cat;
- In your free time, go in for sports, listen to music loudly, play games, and do whatever you like, and not trudge to your partner's mother in Ust-Kukuevo to pick tomatoes for winter harvesting;
- Go on vacation wherever you want and at any time convenient for you;
- Not listening to other people's problems every night;
- Wear the clothes that you like, and not the ones in which you look attractive to your partner;
- Eating the right diet or eating one cheap noodles with sausages and beer
Many children of domineering parents find themselves perfectly in a "lonely life." And as soon as they meet with someone a couple of times, they begin to think whether it is worth getting into self-restraint for the sake of another person. Usually, if there is no love, not worth it. After all, it will still not work to build something durable.
Signs of the phenomenon2
In classical literature, we find a variety of options:
- It's time - she fell in love. That is, any suitable object is taken, and an unearthly passion is invented. Well common among exalted, well-read young ladies and gentlemen savvy in romantic sources;
- Stopping time, being struck by thunder and other special effects. Also an option for emotional people, but it can have a real basis;
- Long "Soviet friendship" continued in the form of a strong family. This option is used by most rational people who are not simply amazed by the thunder.
It is not possible to formulate this. Psychologists distinguish between being in love, a temporary state, and more mature feelings. And the watershed here goes according to the principle "I am ready to sacrifice my interests for the sake of a partner."
The Cat Principle 3
A girl lives for herself, raises a cat. He meets a guy, and, like, love is tied to them. They meet for a long time, by modern standards, about three months. The man keeps asking the lady to move, start living together, save up for the down payment on the mortgage, and do all sorts of adult things. Only now he does not want to see a cat in his house.
If it was about social advertising or a misogynistic demotivator from social networks, the furry one would go to the shelter. But we are looking for an indicator of real feelings. So a man has problems understanding this phenomenon. Yes, if you love a girl, put up with her cat. After all, she also doesn't like your mom, who always counts panties in the dresser, or your friend with his beer and football. But she is silent, or makes a joke.
A cat can be anything from a real pet to a few credits hanging from a passion object. If a person thinks more not about relationships and mutual assistance, but about how to get rid of the “indicator”, he should admit to himself, he should look for another partner.
She has bouts of aggression
A boyfriend lives, meets a girl. He has a great job, a high income, and even has two days off a week. She quits her annoying job as a salesperson, and decides to pursue self-development and look for something creative, suitable for her multifaceted personality, more than putting T-shirts on the shelves and helping in fitting rooms.
And then the passion is replaced. Incomprehensible claims, shouts about scattered things and an innocent hobby in the form of a computer game, checking phones, wild fits of jealousy. They say she is bored, she needs a child, or a job, or more household chores. Depends on who advises. She complains that sincerity and feelings are gone.
In fact, nothing appeared, but only from the woman's side. She just looked for stability for herself, found it, began to look for more information about "happiness and self-development", and came across happy insta-families, where the husband is the embodiment of everything she would like. Latently, the girl realizes that her partner is not the hero of the novel, and there are no feelings. But in fact, she really does not want to go as a seller and look for love, so she tries to control herself, but it turns out badly.
Friends and their privileges5
And it also happens that the relationship is nowhere stronger, but the answer to the main question from both sides is negative. Here the notorious word with the letter "L" replaces mutual respect and natural attraction to each other of different sexes.
In an everyday sense, this is the strongest couple of all. But there is no stability and here, as soon as one of the “Friends” meets love, big problems begin. It's bad when the guys managed to have children and acquire social ties. The breakup will be painful. Well, it's almost normal if the family does not exist for long.
Doubts and couples6
They often start to doubt if they see that the relationship does not unfold according to a pre-planned scenario. For example, a girl sincerely wants to get married and have a child as soon as possible, and a guy wants to go rafting on mountain rivers, it is possible with her, and without her, too, but he doesn't need any child right now. Better a good tent and boots. And thermal underwear will not hurt.
She doubts her feelings, and she doubts him too. How can you fail to notice all these hints in the form of reposts from groups about preparing for pregnancy, buying vitamin E, courageously refusing to smoke and beer, and even signing up for the gym. He also cannot understand what is happening. It can be seen that in history there are only tents and sleeping bags, videos from hikes are watched on YouTube, and he also went to the tourism section for a reason.
If a difference is found in the nearest preferences, this does not always mean that there are no feelings or they are not real. Maybe people just haven't learned to communicate with each other. And that, at first, the interaction of a couple comes down to eating together, having fun and bed. You have to learn to talk a little later.
There is no stereotyped answer and no unambiguous signs. Moreover, each person understands love in his own way. If the preferences of both in a couple coincide, the relationship will be happy. Well, those who suddenly find that they are not working should be doubly happy - the sooner you discover a mistake, the easier it is to fix it.