Should A Guy Confess His Feelings First? Weigh Everything

Almost all girls in love ask this question if the guy hesitates with recognition. So is it worth doing? For a start, it would be nice to understand why he himself does not take the first step, because women's initiative in relationships is still ambiguously perceived by society and the guys are well aware of this. Should I confess my feelings to a guy or wait until he does it himself?

The content of the article

• 1 Why doesn't he say the cherished three words?
• 2 Why it is better not to take the initiative
• 3 Or should I confess?
• 4 You made up your mind. How to do it?
• 5 And then what?

Why doesn't he say the cherished three words? I

Psychologists have come up with (or studied in practice) several very compelling reasons why a guy may hesitate to take the first step.

First, he is too shy. If so, shyness is unlikely to be about just that. Take a closer look at how quickly he can make decisions in other situations?

Second, he does not consider it necessary to talk about it, but he does things, from his point of view, that clearly speak of his feelings.

Third, he is afraid to hear “no”. If you more than once let him know that you liked him, kept up the conversation, responded with a smile to his gaze and calmly reacted to his "casual, friendly" touches - this reason can most likely be excluded from the list. Although, if a guy has already received a refusal, he really is unlikely to dare to repeat this extreme experience.

Fourth, he is not at all sure that he is experiencing something in relation to you, or believes that it is too early. Wait for the confession. If he is not ready for this, it is unlikely that his answer will please you.

Fifth, he has a girlfriend or is in love with another. You just don't know about it.

Why it is better not to take the initiative2

The risk that the guy will not reciprocate you is very high. Practice shows that even the most notorious "nerd", if he is really in love, will find a way to make a girl understand that he is not indifferent to her. Honestly, to count on the fact that he is silent out of modesty or fear of being rejected, in most cases, is too naive.

Young men tend to jump to conclusions. So the likelihood that you will be considered frivolous or just an approachable person is very high. Make no mistake with the guy's self-image. No matter how cute and modest he may seem through the rose-colored glasses of falling in love, it is quite possible that this impression is deceiving.

Most importantly, as mentioned, there is a chance that your confession will be completely unsuccessful. And it's pretty big. Some psychologists reasonably believe that it is better to regret for some time that you did not dare to confess than to get a lot of complexes and even psychological trauma for life.

Or should I confess?

Arguments "for" in the question of whether it is worth confessing to a guy in feelings is much less. For confident girls, such a confession is a reason to be proud of their courage. Even if he refuses, you can forget about it and have no illusions.

There are cases when a guy is really just shy or “slows down” for some reason (although this is 1 out of 10 situations. Russian roulette gives more chances). The decision is yours.

If you do not want to doubt for the rest of your life - what if it was your destiny, and you missed it? (you have been warned about possible risks, haven't you?)

You have made up your mind. How to do it? 4

Oh well. Are you sure that he is not indifferent to you, consulted with your friends, learned something from his friends and looked at his page on social networks. Then it's time to act.

The right moment is still needed. If a guy has a toothache, has just had a fight with his best friend, or is in trouble at home - the moment, as you yourself understand, is not very suitable for romantic confessions.

You should not express your feelings directly. It is better to make it clear about what you are experiencing through gestures, facial expressions, smiles, compliments and actions. If you can't do without words, "I like you" and "I feel so good with you" - it will be better than direct and unequivocal recognition. Firstly, this way you will not scare even the most timid guy, and secondly, in case of failure, leave yourself room for "maneuver".

But you shouldn't write love letters. Not only can a guy take things not the way you want them to. All too often, such confessions become common knowledge. You really don't want your feelings to become a topic of general discussion, do you? Better to present a surprise (with some subtext, of course).

What then? 5

Set yourself up in advance that you will retain friendly sympathy for the person in any case. Even if he does not reciprocate you - is this a reason to hate him? His feelings, like yours, deserve respect.

If it didn't work out, in no case should you stoop to pursuit, hysterics or threats. Maintain your dignity. You knew that things could not go as you dreamed?

It's not worth making tragedies out of this either. Just not your man. It happens. Perhaps you were mistaken in mistaking a friendly sympathy or a temporary infatuation for love. It happens. And your love is still ahead and when you meet it, you will not have to think about how, what and when to say. Everything will happen by itself.