Table of contents:
- Interesting facts
- An old friend is better than two new ones? 2
- Cons of having sex with a friend3
- Is it that simple? 4
- Option One: Friends and Lovers5
- Option two: conscious intimacy6
- Option Three: Complete Failure7
- Option four: understatement 8
- Friendship + Sex: How Not to Lose a Friend9
Surely, most of the lovers of modern cinema have more than once watched the film "Friendship Sex" in which the relationship of friends smoothly flows into love and romantic. This sweet story gives optimistic hopes that even in an unpredictable situation, an old and reliable friend will become not just a lover, but also a life partner. All this is far away, but now morning has come and the question is obsessively spinning in my head: what to do if I slept with a friend?
The content of the article
- 1 Interesting facts
- 2 An old friend is better than two new ones?
- 3 Cons of having sex with a friend
- 4 Is it that simple?
- 5 Option one: friends and lovers
- 6 Option two: deliberate sex
- 7 Option three: complete failure
- 8 Option four: understatement
- 9 Friendship + sex: how not to lose a friend
Sex has recently ceased to be seen as an indispensable stage in marital relations. At the moment, the relationship of young people has become easier, and the attitude towards sex as a physical need. If you find the "ancient" statistics for 1988-1996, then you will find that 55% of the students surveyed had physical intimacy with a friend. After 14 years, the results had grown to 68%.
The reason for unexpected sex with a long-known friend can be the most common things: joint gatherings, rest in the company of alcohol, mental trauma or an unsuccessful relationship with one of your friends.
For a man, relationships are more needed for sex and he does not see anything terrible in the satisfaction of instinct. The girl will be very liberated under the influence of alcohol or wanting to take revenge on her ex-boyfriend, and in the morning she will torment herself with guilt and contempt for a rash act. On the one hand, the person is well known and there is no point in wasting time on courtship and long walks along the night boulevards.
On the other hand, he is a friend! Reliable and loyal, loyal and sincere. It is he who will come in the evening when she feels bad or will help her solve problems, lend his shoulder and listen to another tearful confession that all guys are the same. After a girl slept with a friend, is a relationship already starting? Are there any advantages from such "friendship" or are these imposed stereotypes of a free society?
In 2003, Paul Monroe interviewed couples of students to find out what sex with a friend is like for young people. As a result of the polls, we managed to isolate several typologies of relationships with friends. When compiling the sample, Mogno took into account the motives and hopes for a long-term relationship. As a result of the polls, all the answers were divided into seven groups:
- Just friends who decide to have sex without obligation.
- Sex partners with no feelings or friendships.
- A relationship in which you can sleep with a friend and become an alternate airfield for him to relieve tension.
- Sex was initiated as the first step to leave the friend zone and become a couple.
- Sex was an accidental reason for the transition to partnerships.
- The relationship became closer due to the sympathy of one partner for the second, but intimacy did not bring the transition to a full-fledged relationship.
Partners have ceased to be a couple, but occasionally have sex
An old friend is better than two new ones? 2
Scientists have been worried about the relationship between men and women. Where is the fine line between friendship and willingness to share a bed? The answer to the question lies on the surface: people, during the time spent together, become close in spirit.
The main plus of close intimate communication with a friend is ease of communication, this is exactly the person who saw the girl in all "states of aggregation". You don't have to try to look more attractive than you are. He has known for a long time that the size of the breast is much smaller, the eyes are not so expressive, and the chic curls are false.
An old friend is ready for sex without obligation and there is no need to arrange "mating games" to lure the male into the den. Sex can happen during the usual gatherings in the kitchen or a joint trip in the car.
The relationship of most couples in the early stages lacks ease of communication. Everyone is ready to get out of their skin to impress their partner and show him the best sides of his personality. A guy and a girl know everything about each other for sure, and no one is worth illusions about relationships.
Cons of having sex with a friend3
Not everything is as rosy as in Hollywood films! There are two people and long-term friendships. Now they have become physically closer and one begins to make plans for a relationship. This option is also possible! According to polls, friendship sex in a third of cases ends with the termination of the relationship, 10% become a full-fledged couple.
When the relationship is smoothly moving to intimacy and this is not a spontaneous decision after a couple of bottles of strong alcohol, there is time to weigh the pros and cons. After all, a short sexual affair can both develop relationships further, and alienate friends forever. If two people understand that sex without love is just a physiological need and it has no continuation, then the girl will not have to think why she slept with a friend and whether it could end in a relationship.
Senseless illusions will not lead to anything positive. Purely physical intimacy will not fill you spiritually, but it will not take away your last strength, it will not break your heart. Pure sex and orgasm! The main rule for the future is never to tell you that you were intimate with a friend. Relationships will forever be tainted by jealous nagging from current partners.
Is it that simple? 4
Sex with a friend is a topic of long discussions with both sexes. If everything has already happened or is just being planned, it is worth predicting possible scenarios for the development of events. What will happen next: a couple of lovers, a couple of friends, or two people who will never meet again?
But in any case, it will be useful to read an article about if a girl slept with her best friend.
Option One: Friends and Lovers5
Various circumstances and a little frank conversations, flavored with alcohol and complaints about unsuccessful relationships, and it becomes embarrassing, pounding and breathlessness in the temples, and the closest and most inconspicuous friend becomes damn sexy. Spark and passion long in the night of love. In the morning it is not at all a shame to look into each other's eyes, each showed himself from his best side and opened in a different light. Now a couple of friends are also becoming lovers.
You do not need to look for partners for sex on the side and you can build a career, engage in a hobby and periodically relieve stress in bed with a friend. If you let go of the moral side of the relationship and turn to the opinion of psychologists, then the prospect of such a union is dubious.
Only a third of friends' relationships with sex end in cohabitation or marriage, the rest cannot stand the combination of roles and move away from each other.
Option two: conscious intimacy6
The guy and the girl have been friends for a long time, always aware of the events taking place in the partner's personal life. When one of the friends does not have a partner and the other agrees to help, there comes a moment of conscious closeness. Both future partners agree that sex is not a step towards a relationship, but an opportunity to help relieve tension and relax through friendship. Confessions can be a tricky moment for friendship.
In relationships between friends, which are formed not from kindergarten, but from puberty, a girl and a guy choose a friend they look like. Needless to say, over time, simple sympathy develops into real passion on the part of one of your friends? Feelings are hidden and the second or second does not know about them for years.
Often after intimacy, under the influence of hormones, all secrets float out and feelings are revealed. What will happen next? Or a complete failure in which the friend does not understand where emotions and feelings come from, or this will be the first step to a real romantic relationship.
Option Three: Complete Failure7
Friendship goes like everyone else: common parties, discussions of mutual acquaintances, problems at work and life failures and romances. Nothing indicates a special sexual relationship, and here like a bolt from the blue - sex. Bad sex that two people didn't like. In a normal situation, you should not even think about further actions and, collecting things, leave forever.
It wouldn't be fair to do that to a friend. Friendship is clearly the end and nothing else can return the old relationship. Trying to talk about the future is useless. Time will put everything in its place, and perhaps over time, the relationship will turn to friendly.
Option four: understatement 8
Sex happened and both were satisfied and satisfied with new sensations. In the head of a girl who slept with a friend, plans for the future and development of relationships immediately begin to take shape. A certain psychotype and sensitivity, the absence of a permanent partner or a long absence of romantic relationships becomes fertile ground. While the guy neither sleep nor spirit knows about the general plans.
He just had sex with a girl, a girl he knew well. Pure sex and no romance. The minus of the situation is in the understatement: she feels used, and he does not understand what they want from him after normal sex. How did a friend who understood him best of all become an ordinary girl and immediately wants to appropriate him and make him dependent on her? Everything can be mirrored on the contrary: she agreed to help her friend, and he melts from feelings for her.
It is not difficult to predict further development: the more pragmatic partner will begin to be annoyed by constant tenderness and recognition, and the second will not find the embodiment of his desires and gradually the passion will go out.
The second option is optimistic: the second partner will gradually melt under the pressure of tenderness and courtship and surrender into the hands of an old friend, who will now become a lover and partner.
Friendship + Sex: How Not to Lose a Friend9
Free relationships based on sex between friends are not always as colorful in practice as shown in movies. Finding a good and reliable friend is not easy, just as difficult as combining friendship and pure sex. Partners can be friends for years, but at the same time not be able to build relationships on naked sex.
It's rare luck when a guy and a girl don't need emotional attachment to their partner. Women tend to want more conversations, romance, psychological mood before sex.
Before agreeing to a relationship without obligation with a friend, you need to think and refer yourself to one of the psychotypes. If emotions and psychologically comfort have always been in the first place in a relationship, and there has never been pragmatic sex without feelings, one should not hope that this time it will be possible not to lose a friend.
Deficit of communication becomes a stumbling block in relationships with friends. Oddly enough, friendship-based couples rarely talk about desires in bed. There are a lot of topics for conversation, but intimate conversations, as a rule, do not happen. To make the relationship more comfortable, you need to talk more often. For starters, it is important to establish rules for communication outside of bed and prospects for the future.
It is unfair when one hopes for a relationship, and the other, meanwhile, meets with other partners on the side. No matter how trusting the relationship is, forgetting about protection is unsafe. There are children from sex, and then what should people do who did not even want a serious relationship?
When establishing the rules for communication at a close level, do not forget about the term of "friendship". There is always a chance to get used to and get carried away with sex so much that the partner will become close and dear, and then fall in love is at hand! Sex can be a couple of times a month, weekly, but at least every day. The main thing is not to create illusions and honestly discuss that there will be no continuation and that this is just help in a friendly way.
Whatever style of behavior is chosen, you always need to be able to stop in time. The fine line between love and friendship is easy to cross. The first place should always be the psychological comfort of a friend and temporary lover.
Inflicting emotional pain and hoping for a happy ending is pointless. Sharing goals or communicating details can help you find a balance between friendship and sex with mutual benefit.