What If The Relationship Gets Boring?

Table of contents:

What If The Relationship Gets Boring?
What If The Relationship Gets Boring?
Video: What If The Relationship Gets Boring?
Video: Why do I feel BORED in healthy relationships? Why do STABLE relationships make me want to RUN?! 2023, February
Jennifer Aniston
Jennifer Aniston

Scientists from the University of Syracuse have found that during the period of falling in love, 12 areas are activated in the human brain. Their work provokes the release of a large amount of biochemical substances into the blood. Against this background, there is a feeling of joy, euphoria when being next to a loved one, "butterflies" in the stomach. However, over time, partners may notice that the relationship has become boring.

The content of the article

  • 1 Stage one - conversations
  • 2 The second stage - own development
  • 3 The third stage is working on relationships
  • 4 Return to the past
  • 5 Own social circle
  • 6 Change of scene

This is due to the fact that the brain cannot constantly work in such a "turbo" mode. Over time, biochemical reactions calm down (on average - after 2 years), and only psychological attachment remains. At this time, changes begin in the body, some hormones are replaced by others. Partners feel differently in relationships. And if earlier they were not bothered by everyday issues and monotony, now it can turn into a real disaster. How to deal with this?

First stage - conversations

Sometimes it's enough to just talk frankly with your partner to understand that the problem is not that big. If the relationship has become boring, then some needs are not satisfied. By voicing these needs to a partner, one of the couple makes it easier for the other. After all, it is difficult to guess what is happening in a person's head if he does not talk about it. At the same time, in this way, you can understand whether the other half sees a problem in the relationship, or for him this is the norm.

Second stage - own development2

If the relationship has become more monotonous, this can be perceived as an opportunity to take time for yourself. Go in for sports, find a new hobby, enroll in clay modeling courses. This will delight the person and immediately reflect on his companion. Don't expect your partner to come up with entertainment himself. It is much more effective to start with yourself. Seeing how interesting and fun his soul mate has become, a person will also pull up to this process.

Stage Three - Working on Relationships3

If during the first stage (discussion of the problem) it turned out that the partner would also like to change something, it's time to start living in a new way. The following methods will help rekindle a spark in a relationship, refresh it, and get new experiences.

Joint "sorties"

Constantly sitting within the four walls of an apartment, it is no wonder sooner or later feel boredom. Therefore, it is very important to make joint trips to the cinema, theater, visiting friends, park or club, meeting new people. This will not only help you unwind, but it will also provide topics for conversation.

routine in a relationship
routine in a relationship

Don't underestimate the role of dating, especially if the couple is already living together. At least one evening a week should be spent together outside the home environment.


Every day you need to tell your partner about your love. Kiss goodbye, say good night, send cute messages throughout the day, hug when you meet. These are all very important to maintain intimacy, especially in a long-term relationship.

You can also prepare breakfast or coffee in bed. Hide the candy in your half's coat pocket. Write a romantic note and put it in your briefcase (purse). Light candles and take a bath so that the companion can rest after a working day. All this is very touching and helps to keep the fire of passion in a relationship. Even if they are not too diverse, cute little things will help you see only good things.

Intimate life

This is a huge platform that will diversify relationships. Let the sex be spontaneous - you can provoke your partner during cleaning or other common activity. Men can watch massage lessons, women can learn several movements of erotic dance.

solve the problem of boredom in a relationship
solve the problem of boredom in a relationship

Going to a sex shop together is also a good walk. And new impressions will be added, and an unusual sexual experience. Sex in an unusual place, such as a park at night, will provide pleasant memories.

Leaving your comfort zone

The method is advised by Sonya Lubomirsky, professor of psychology at the University of California. She says that striving to constantly be in your comfort zone can "bury" family happiness.

To prevent this from happening, you need to take part in the interests of your partner. For example, if a man likes fishing, a woman can arrange it for him and go with him to the river bank. Or visit a poker game, ride bicycles, etc. A young man can go with his beloved to dance classes or go shopping. The main thing is to do it with genuine interest so that the partner sees - his half is ready to change and try for his pleasure.

Try everything new together

It doesn't matter if it's a parachute jump or a new sushi delivery. It is enough just to take the "risk" together in order to acquire joint impressions. Even if they are negative, the fact that the couple experienced it together will bring partners closer together and bring new emotions.

5 easy steps to restore interest
5 easy steps to restore interest

Pleasant surprises

The easiest way to help fix a boring relationship. Gifts don't have to be expensive or fancy. You just need to make them. A bouquet of flowers for no reason, a new tie, a self-chosen T-shirt or just a fridge magnet in the shape of a partner's name - all this will be a pleasant sign of attention and show that there are still feelings between the spouses. A good idea that will “kill two birds with one stone” is to present your beloved with a certificate for linen. And surprise, and variety in sex.

Surprises don't need to be done very often. Once or twice a week, if small, is sufficient.

Return to the past4

Relevant for people who have been together for a very long time. The methodology is spelled out in the book "5 Simple Steps from an Ordinary Marriage to a Great", written by professor of psychology Terry Orbukh.

She invites partners to remember what kind of relationship they had in the beginning and try to fake it. Memories of the feelings that then covered the couple will show what is now missing in the marriage and help restore interest.

why is it boring in a relationship
why is it boring in a relationship

Own social circle5

Constantly communicating only with each other, topics for conversation dry up, there is nothing to talk about, boredom arises. Therefore, you do not need to be alone all the time or walk in the same company. It's important to meet your own friends separately.

If the partners are hanging out with the same company, it is a good idea to invite everyone to your house or organize a small picnic. This will strengthen the friendship and make the couple's leisure time more fun and not boring in the relationship.

Change of scenery6

Arranging a real getaway is a great way to diversify your personal life. Leave home, work, all household chores and give up on the tropical islands. Or just spend one night in a hotel in your city. Make it a honeymoon memory for a couple and a great adventure for an unmarried partner.

If financial opportunities do not allow, or the weekend does not coincide, you can just take a bottle of champagne and get out on the roof in the city. Or arrange a gathering at your favorite place in the park, wrapped in a blanket in the evening.

If you become bored in a relationship, this is not a reason to break up. It is normal when life with a partner becomes calm, everyday life and household chores appear. The most important thing is to be able to diversify your leisure time in order to happily remember the time spent together and open up to each other in a new way.

Popular by topic