Table of contents:
Frankly, jealousy is only good in small doses. If a man is not the hero of a Brazilian TV series for housewives, he is unlikely to be ready to endure the daily brain drain for years. What if you are dating a pathological jealous woman? Or worse - what if you are that jealous girl?
The content of the article
- 1 Role reversal
- 2 Mars and Venus
- 3 Anti-anxiety therapy
- 4 If You Are That Jealous Girl
Men cannot stand being restricted in some way, throwing tantrums and rummaging through their phones.
Girls are not the only ones who know how to plot.
Sometimes guys want to play games too.
If a man, for one reason or another, lacks the attention that he receives from a particular girl, he tries to awaken jealousy in her.
How do men do it?
We reveal the cards.
On the sly
To begin with, any manipulation of human feelings is a dangerous game. You can't act openly. While you are careful, the fish will bite the bait. She wonders why you are not giving her (the fish) as much attention as before.
If the fish feels false and sees the shine of a metal hook, it simply turns around and waves its tail.
This applies to both men and women.
Zoom in - zoom out
Men are very adept at using this technique.
By the way, women also love to play push-pull. Who and when invented this game is unknown. We will now consider this tactic of behavior on the example of men.
First, he gives the girl attention, falls asleep with compliments and radiant smiles.
And then he starts to ignore her.
The "victim" is at a loss. She begins to literally jump out of her high-waisted pants, trying to figure out what she did wrong. She loses weight, changes her hairstyle, improves her culinary and sexual skills and … thinks out. Where is he, who is he with, how and how many times.
What does the richness of the imagination of a jealous girl compare to?
Imagine Stephen King, Nicholas Sparks, and Pierre Woodman team up to create a horror-melodrama-hardcore movie.
There are many other fish in the sea
When a man is alone with his lady, all his eloquence is spent exclusively on her.
But as soon as other girls appear nearby, the prince's behavior immediately changes.
He deliberately makes his girlfriend jealous by flirting with other attractive persons. No vulgarity, no excesses. Secular communication, that's all.
You will not dig in.
Girls are from Venus, men are from Mars, and stuff like that.
And we still steal the tricks from each other.
How to make your partner jealous?
Start laughing with another girl's / another guy's jokes.
We all want to appear funny and witty. Especially next to someone who we care about.
And when this most indifferent one begins to laugh with stupid jokes of some busty girl, it infuriates.
I wonder if he's really funny or just wants to stare at her?
The crown move is when he defiantly ignores the jokes of a girl who wants to cause jealousy.
Touch your hand, put your hand on your back, etc. Harmless tactile contact. Brave enough to provoke jealousy, harmless enough to answer all accusations with an angelic smile.
A man will not go beyond what is permitted. And he will act only when the gaze of the jealous woman is fixed on him.
Talking about other girls
He can specifically praise his friends / acquaintances / colleagues and talk about how funny, interesting, cool, etc.
Why is this done?
In order for the girl to start going crazy with jealousy.
Some men do this in order to "motivate" a woman for self-improvement, both external and internal.
How to make an already jealous girl go crazy?
Ignore her calls and messages on social networks, while actively interacting with other girls.
Upload photos from a stormy party full of beautiful girls. Communicate actively with them in the comments, joke and flirt.
Even the most calm and independent girl will be furious with this.
Photos with other girls
Let's reveal the previous point in more detail.
To make the girl jealous, he will post pictures in which he is depicted in the company of other girls.
Cheerful "stories" and colorful photos, full of beauties.
And this is all despite the fact that he refuses to upload photos with his girlfriend, coming up with various excuses.
Without you, without you …
He will talk in color about how much fun he had last night. You don't even have to mention other girls here.
Some ladies are very offended if a boyfriend manages to enjoy life outside the company of his beloved.
How dare he!
If a guy beamingly smiles at the screen of his smartphone when he reads a message, but refuses to say who wrote to him, what reaction will the girl have?
To put it mildly, negative.
Who amuses you so much, huh ?!
Ignore in the company
When a guy and a girl appear in a company, he seems to forget about his beloved. Communicates with anyone but her. As if she did not notice how the girl literally boils with anger.
But this is not the case.
In fact, this is exactly what he wanted.
All of the above are psychological manipulations used by both girls and guys.
It is important to remember the following here:
- Everything should be in moderation. If you get too carried away with these games, there is a great risk that the relationship will fall apart. You will simply be sent to hell, and you will find yourself in the "ignore".
- There is always a line that is not worth crossing, because it is fraught with consequences.
Why do guys and girls deliberately make each other jealous? What is it all about? Don't they want a normal, healthy relationship?
I want to.
But a child lives in each of us throughout our life. Which very quickly begins to get bored with monotony.
That is why so many coaches and relationship gurus have recently divorced who advise from time to time to shake up the partner - to distance themselves, surprise and even shock.
Like, without this, your other half will relax, stop trying for you, and love will begin to fade away.
Well, that makes a lot of common sense.
The main thing is not to overdo it and not destroy the relationship with your own hands.
Mars and Venus2
We started our article by talking about female jealousy. A favorite theme of various jokes, memes, sitcoms, stand-up performances, etc.
We also talked about the fact that while some men are going crazy from this very jealousy, others, on the contrary, are trying to cause it in all possible ways.
The topic is quite extensive, it is just right to write a dissertation.
But let's talk about men too.
Or rather, about the difference between male and female jealousy.
This feeling has no age. Both children and adults experience it.
Jealousy has no gender. Both men and women, feeling a prick of jealousy, make scandals, say and do various ugly things, after which they feel ashamed.
We are jealous of our other half not only for sexually attractive members of the opposite sex. But also to friends, parents and even hobbies.
It's okay to be jealous. Exactly until this green monster absorbs you completely and completely.
Let's turn to science. Researchers David Frederick of Chapman University and Melissa Thales of the University of California, Los Angeles conducted a study trying to validate the long-standing idea that men are more likely to experience sexual jealousy (regardless of whether there is an emotional connection), while women are more likely to experience emotional jealousy. (regardless of whether sex was involved or not).
The study was successful.
Similar studies have been carried out before. But the test groups were relatively small, including exclusively heterosexuals.
David and Malissa, on the other hand, approached the matter with heart - in their study participated 64,000 people. Among them were heterosexuals, homosexuals and bisexuals (both sexes) between the ages of eighteen and sixty-five.
They asked the subjects the question: "What would upset you more - if your partner slept with someone without feeling feelings, or fell in love, but did not sleep?"
54% of heterosexual men answered that the fact of physical adultery would upset them the most.
Only 35% of heterosexual women, 32% of gay men, 34% of lesbians, 30% of bisexual men and 27% of bisexual women agreed with them.
To explain this wide difference in views, researchers turned to evolution. Before DNA analysis was invented, a man could not be sure that the child he was raising was actually born of him.
Raising a child is a huge responsibility. Not every man is able to devote himself entirely to someone else's son or daughter.
Now it becomes clear why the fact of physical infidelity for men is much more terrible than the romantic feelings of a partner for another.
Women who cheated on their partners and hid this fact, in turn, are afraid of losing a man and being left with a child in their arms.
Now back to heterosexual women. Many women to the question "Could you forgive treason?" answer in the negative. Or they say the following: "Only if it was just sex, without feelings." What is the reason for this approach?
If a man does not feel emotional attachment to a woman, it is highly likely that he will leave her (sooner or later). This is how naive wives and no less naive mistresses calm themselves down. If a man experiences something more for a woman than just a sexual attraction, most likely he will go to her, leaving another.
Evolution is, of course, great. She can explain literally everything. But Frederic and Thales decided to dig a little deeper.
What kind of man can be called "real"? What is the definition of masculinity and brutality?
The "real man" is required to have a pumped-up sexual skill. And as long as his woman is happy with everything and wriggles under him, crumpling the sheets, everything seems to be fine. But what if it suddenly turns out that she has someone on the side? It turns out that a man cannot satisfy his partner, i.e. does not cope with its duties. Too strong a blow to the fragile male ego.
Now let's look at the concept of a "real woman". What is she, this your "real" and "ideal" life partner? Affectionate, gentle, caring and - attention! - emotional.
It is much easier for a woman to experience the fact that her partner slept with another. "By stupidity", "drunk", etc. But to find out that a beloved man fell in love with another, for many girls, is tantamount to a disaster.
Be that as it may, this study does not at all mean that men cannot be upset by the fact that their lady of heart is breathing unevenly towards another, and women are ready to give everyone carte blanche for physical adultery.
Men and women really think and feel differently.
Yet they are from the same planet.
If jealousy poisons the life of both partners, it is necessary to start a fight with it. From all fronts and as soon as possible.
If you are dating a jealous girl:
- Don't play on her feelings. Jealousy in your relationship is more than enough.
- Do not let her violate your personal boundaries, but do not shy away from harmless questions - it really is important for her to know where you were and with whom. If you don’t tell her yourself, she’ll think for you. And you won't like the result.
- Jealous girls are often extremely insecure. Avoid offensive jokes and jokes. This will not benefit her or your peace of mind.
- It is important for her to feel special. Talk to her about this as often as possible.
If you are that jealous girl4
- Don't make the man the center of your universe. Take care of yourself, your life and leisure. You must have solid ground under your feet - your favorite work, hobbies, your own circle of friends.
- Work out your complexes. Get rid of the hurt and trauma that your previous relationship has inflicted on you.
- Don't overstep your partner's personal boundaries. Don't force him to be with you 24/7. Don't give him ultimatums. This is incredibly infuriating.