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Video: TOP 7 Ways To Get Rid Of Jealousy And Mistrust
Before talking about how to deal with jealousy and mistrust, you need to know what jealousy is.
The content of the article
- 1 What is jealousy?
- 2 Where does jealousy come from?
- 3 How to get rid of jealousy?
What is jealousy? I
Let's first understand what jealousy is. Jealousy is a feeling that arises in a person when he is afraid that a loved one might leave his life and go to another person, pay him more attention. Historically, jealousy has been one of the methods of natural selection.
It began to develop when society was still polygamous and became one of the steps towards monogamy. Couples and families began to appear, men began to devote more time to their children and their upbringing. Thus, moving, so to speak, from quantity to quality.
Where does jealousy come from? 2
Jealousy, like all other functions of the body, such as ways of perceiving the world, and the way of thinking and many others, is formed in childhood. According to psychologists, if a person experiences problems with trust and jealousy, then his parents and upbringing are most likely to blame for this. The first man in every girl's life is her father.
And if the relationship with him was built on distrust and on a bad attitude, then with a high probability, the girl will not trust all the other men and will be constantly jealous. Mother also plays an important role. If from a young age she insisted to the child that men should not be trusted, or showed it by other actions, then the girl will try to find confirmation of this all her life.
Jealousy, in the best way possible, shows low self-esteem and a tendency to possessiveness. For example, a child may, from childhood, begin to be jealous of his parents for his brothers and sisters if he is given less attention than them. This is one of the popular reasons why girls are jealous.
If the child is the only one in the family, he may receive too much attention from his parents, and then, getting used to this, he will want and demand the same attitude from his partner. A jealous person with low self-esteem will always believe that they are not worthy of love and will not be able to believe that the feelings are real. Unknowingly, he will look for a threat to the relationship and test his partner.
He will constantly scan his phone, bag, computer and social networks in search of confirmation that in fact he is simply being deceived. And thus, even if he does not find a real reason, he will always be able to screw it up and think it over. Most often, jealousy arises from the fact that a person is convinced that something is wrong.
So, for example, if a girl gained a couple of extra pounds, then she will automatically begin to be jealous of the guy for all the slimmer girls. A short man will begin to be jealous of his woman towards everyone who is taller than him, and so on.
It is important to remember that jealousy can only destroy a relationship. If you are constantly jealous of your partner, then he will feel that he is not trusted. You yourself constantly feel fear, mistrust and suspicion, and such behavior can only lead to quarrels and resentments. More on the psychology of jealousy in our article.
How to get rid of jealousy? 3
So, if you agree that you tend to be constantly suspicious of your partner, then it's time to learn how to deal with jealousy and distrust of your partner.
Start trusting your soul mate. The most important thing is trust in a relationship. If you are constantly jealous, then this is an indicator that you do not believe that he loves you. In addition, your partner feels your jealousy and distrust and it does not bring him any pleasure
Start communicating more with your partner. Tell him about your feelings about this, specify when exactly it appears and why. The main thing is to try to do it calmly, without accusations and quarrels. Try to think about how you can reduce this feeling, and at the same time yourself try to understand if it has a reason
- Every time you feel jealousy, take a deep breath and try to calm down. Try not to jump to conclusions. Try to look at the situation from his point of view with an open mind. Ask yourself the question again: "Do I have real reasons for jealousy?", "Does he deceive me?", "Does he want to hurt me with his actions?"
- Try to imagine an image for which you feel jealous. Perhaps it will be some kind of character trait or appearance. Try to understand that if you are jealous of this, then most likely you are just jealous. So there is a reason to take care of yourself.
- If your imaginary opponent has a beautiful figure, sign up for a gym, if he is an interesting interlocutor, start studying something or read interesting articles and books. In general, try to be better than him. And the matter will not even be in the result itself, but in the fact that you are trying. Believe me, your partner will notice this and he will be very pleased that you are trying not to make him to blame for everything, but you want to become better for him.
How to make a man jealous? you can find out about this in our article below the link.
And most importantly, raise your self-esteem. Your partner is with you because he loves and wants to be there. Remember all the pleasant words that he said about you, is there any point in cheating on such a good person like you? Remember that your partner has friends and needs to spend time with them
Moreover, friends can be of both sexes. You do not need to be jealous of him for them, and you can use your free time on yourself. Meet your friends, or take care of yourself.
And lastly, if you cannot control your jealousy, then do not be afraid and do not hesitate to seek help from a psychologist, because jealousy can completely ruin and destroy your relationship, and this will negatively affect your future self-esteem and can lead to problems that will already be necessary decide with a psychotherapist
The main reasons why a man is jealous are collected in our article.