Table of contents:
- The seriousness of the relationship with the ex
- Motives of the future beloved2
- Personal doubts and worries3
- Taboo and Restrictions4
- In conclusion 5
Video: How To Start Dating An Ex's Friend: Tactics And Strategy
They are friends. They have known each other since childhood. And friendship for them is not an empty phrase. But it so happened that you parted with one of them, and the second began to show you signs of attention. What to do? Ignore so as not to create additional problems? What if he is "the same"? It takes a lot of courage to start dating an ex-man's friend. Let's weigh the pros and cons. What should be considered?
The content of the article
- 1 Seriousness of relationship with ex
- 2 Motives of the future lover
- 3 Personal doubts and worries
- 4 Taboos and restrictions
- 5 In conclusion
The seriousness of the relationship with the ex
If it was a fleeting romance without much consequence, then there is nothing to worry about. Surely the ex will even be glad of your happiness. It's another matter if you had a serious relationship. It all depends on how peacefully you parted. If the breakup was long and painful, then it is not worth hurting the person even more. Better to wait a while before you start chatting with his friend. In any case, it is better not to advertise these meetings.
The most difficult situation occurs when the spouses separate. The baggage of mutual claims and experiences remains. If the relationship has outlived its usefulness, then everything is in order. But if a man is still tormented by wounded pride, then you can provoke a new surge of aggression. The former will be offended by a friend, he will be forced to make excuses, as a result, a long-standing friendship will suffer. It won't make anyone better.
Motives of the future beloved2
And what, in fact, is this man seeking? Usually, friends support each other. "Dudes are more precious than chicks" - this common expression has become almost a symbol of male solidarity. And here the guy breaks all the rules and canons of real friendship. Take a closer look, perhaps he really has sincere feelings for you. Then starting out with a friend of your ex is giving yourself a chance for a strong, long-term relationship. But there are other motives as well.
Sometimes men wake up cunning and a sense of rivalry. They are ready to spend a lot of time and effort to prove their superiority to each other. And this time, self-affirmation can happen at your expense. Think, are you ready for a new relationship? They will require a lot of effort and time from you. Maybe it's better to leave these friends alone, let them figure out their own complexes?
Personal doubts and worries3
The path to happiness is not always strewn with roses. However, we create many obstacles for ourselves. The mind is tirelessly looking for a cause for concern and, as a rule, finds it. If, after all, you decide to take a risk and start dating a friend of the "ex", then try to save yourself from painful experiences. The new guy will become an unwitting reminder of the old relationship. It will get on your nerves from time to time. Therefore, do not go with him to those places that you associate with your ex-boyfriend.
Don't let him know about your recent breakup. After all, "information leakage" is quite possible. Do you need it? And the new guy will suffer, torn between the beloved and the friend. He will also have a hard time, so respect his feelings. In a word, nothing from the "past" life should penetrate into the present one. What happened is gone, and there is no need to remember it.
Taboo and Restrictions4
They concern more men than women. However, it is necessary to mention them.
- Before you start dating an ex's friend, you need to wait a while. The longer this period, the better. Time heals everything; with it, claims, resentments and embarrassing memories go away. So don't rush. It may be that your ex will quickly have another woman, and with her he will forget about meeting you. Then you can easily start a relationship with his friend.
- New love kills old. It's a matter of ethics. Forget that you are sometimes still drawn to your ex. Torn between two friends is at least ugly. Respect yourself and your man.
- Knowing the truth is the first step to healing. Talk to your ex honestly. It is better if your current lover does it. Let your friends talk like a man, dot the i's. However, even if you receive a formal blessing for marriage, it will not save you from potential problems.
- Warn your new love not to discuss your old relationship with your ex. This can offend and hurt you. Like, there is no need to seek advice on how to handle you. And, of course, there shouldn't be any conversation about sex with you between them. This is at least incorrect.
In conclusion 5
If you started dating a friend of your ex, but the relationship did not work out, then you should not worry about this. Try to maintain respect for each other, avoid abuse and recriminations. You met a wonderful person, you were warm and comfortable with him, so do not cut from the shoulder. Surely you will still be happy with another person. Well, if you are a guy and you are wondering what to do if your ex started dating a friend, then we will show you.