Table of contents:
- Desire does not disappear, but normalizes i
- Physical and psychological fatigue2
- Accumulated problems within relationships3
- Too close proximity4
Video: Where Does Passion Go In Marriage: How To Return Past Pleasure
Everyone knows that over the years sexual desire fades away. But this cannot explain what happens to fairly young married couples. They get married, live together, but for some reason sex is getting less and less. Contrary to stereotypes that men cannot live without sex, mostly women complain about its absence. What is the reason for the loss of attraction, and can this be somehow changed? Let's figure it out!
The content of the article
- 1 Desire does not disappear, but normalizes
- 2 Physical and psychological fatigue
- 3 Accumulated problems within the relationship
- 4 Too close
Desire does not disappear, but normalizes i
This opinion is shared by many scientists who have studied this issue. That stormy period of passion, when we want to be in bed at any convenient and not very convenient occasion, is just not the norm. This is an increased sexual desire, which, as a stable and long-term relationship is established, should come to a certain norm, when the need for intercourse several times a day simply disappears.
What is the norm? Unfortunately, there is no exact answer that is equally true for everyone, this is an extremely individual concept. If both of you see nothing wrong with passion coming, say, once a week, then there are no problems, your relationship is harmonious and balanced. If one of you begins to suffer from a lack of passion and affection, there are things to look out for.
First, quantity does not mean quality. The era of "rabbit-like mating" is replaced by mutual understanding, deep knowledge of each other's needs and preferences, and the interpenetration of sexual fantasies. If your intimate relationships are harmonious, they move to a qualitatively new level, in which the number of sexual acts is not as important as their content.
Second, you’re close enough to feel free to try new things. Sexual practices that you have never used before can add variety to your seemingly cooling relationships. Visit a sex shop, buy new toys, think about what exotic elements you can add to your intimate life. Someone tries unusual postures of the Kama Sutra, others turn to light forms of fetishism, and still others learn the basics of BDSM culture, the main thing is that you both like it. But sometimes, in order to understand yours or not, you need to try at least once. Feel free to do this, you still have a lifetime ahead of you!
Physical and psychological fatigue2
Another important factor affecting the intensity of intimate life is the physical and mental state of partners. Family life is not about carefree meetings at a convenient time for both, but the very same "in grief and joy", and in order to lose interest in intimate caresses, grief is not needed at all. It's enough just chronic fatigue, lack of sleep, exhausting work, and the appearance of children generally takes away the remnants of time and energy, and nothing is left for carnal love.
Psychologists are sure that sex is just one of the forms of psychological intimacy, and one of the most energy-intensive. The sensations of watching your favorite TV show together or walking together in the park allow you to feel the necessary warmth and closeness, but they do not require us to give our all, as on the simulator, especially after we have no strength left for it. So it's no surprise that stable couples prefer quieter ways to spend time with each other.
What if you want passion and love? There is only one way out - to unload your time from various worries. For example, take a vacation, relax, sleep, send children to a children's camp or to a grandmother - and soon the strength for new erotic feats will appear.
Accumulated problems within relationships3
The drop in attraction can be caused not only by external, but also by internal problems. The accumulated mutual claims, which had to be silenced or endured, sooner or later undermine the relationship, and this is primarily manifested in the intimate sphere.
Your passion cools down, you do nothing to prevent it, and the result is disastrous: a devastated marriage, in which a couple of people no longer loved by each other consists, or a divorce. And it's hard to even say which of the two options is worse.
How to be? Only confidential communication will help. Communication will help you avoid problems and not build up resentment. If you cannot find the cause of your discord together, but want to maintain a warm and loving relationship, you should contact a specialist. Not all family psychologists are equally good, but finding the right one for you is always possible. Online consultation may be enough, many specialists accept via skype.
Too close proximity4
Men sometimes joke: “to poke at such a beautiful woman and poke a pussy, what are you?”, But in every joke there is some truth. Excessive rapprochement of loving people can, paradoxically, destroy their sexual interest in each other. How to be?
Try to find ways to express your individuality within the relationship.
Remember your hobbies that you left “for the sake of love”, find new areas of interest that do not coincide with the interests of your partner, remind yourself and your partner that you are not “halves of one whole”, but two individuals who have decided to build life together. Some distance in a relationship can help breathe new life into it.
But where love goes, you should find out in our article further on the link.
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