In Pursuit Of Two Birds With One Stone: To Choose Two Or Still Yourself?

The problem of choice is the cornerstone of all human life. We constantly cannot decide with whom to be friends, how to work, how to earn money, whom to love. In adolescence, everyone goes through a period when they like several girls or guys at once. The most interesting thing is that they are all completely different. At first glance, they have nothing in common.

The content of the article

• 1 Why and why multiple partners are needed?
• 2 Bright flash
• 3 How to distinguish temporary from permanent

Can't love two men or women? But in fact, the answer to the question is completely ambiguous. This topic worries millions of minds, causing heated discussions and discussions on forums. Let's try to figure out what to do and how to be, if you like two equally at the same time.

Why and why multiple partners are needed? I

A scientifically proven fact - not all of us are monogamous. For this, even a special term was introduced - polyamory. Basically, everyone seeks to find the only one with whom he will be able to build strong and harmonious ties. But some, over time, discover an unknown edge in themselves. They want variety. One object of passion is not enough.

There is nothing terrible or shameful about this situation. It is important to come to an understanding of your own desires and needs. Indeed, in some countries, no one will look at it reproachfully. Probably everyone knows what a harem is.

So in those states where polygamy or polyandry is an established norm, there are no problems with parallel stories. In our country, they look at it skeptically, because there are social norms imposed on each of us from childhood.

If you are not polyamorous, then the reason for betrayal and the desire to have several chosen ones at once is explained by the usual selfishness. Men have mistresses to boost their self-esteem. Ladies do all the same. Trying to hide behind a lack of understanding on the part of a permanent partner, people only mask their main motivation - to be the object of attention of other members of society.

Problematic self-esteem is often hidden behind promiscuous contacts. If you are confident in yourself, you will respect your choice.

When the inner balance is distorted, we tend to attract the views of others.

Bright flash2

Let's imagine that someone has long met a soul mate. We created a family that meets all generally accepted standards. Have got offspring, in which now souls do not hate. Love and passion over time deformed into a friendly relationship between two partners. The beloved began to take each other for granted.

Consistency and habit are not to everyone's liking. Especially if long-term relationships are accompanied by regular skirmishes and conflicts based on misunderstandings or domestic troubles. The person feels lonely and abandoned. He loses the mental connection with his significant other. Friends and relatives, however, can not tell every problem.

Suddenly there are thoughts that there is an option to find support on dating sites, in social networks. The matter is simplified by the fact that on the Internet we have the opportunity to impersonate someone else. Having depersonalized their persona, the sufferers embark on a search for like-minded people. Having found someone who is on the same wavelength with you, suddenly a feeling of sympathy and passion is revealed.

Similar outbursts of love happened, most likely, with everyone at least once. Not everyone can see this as an attempt to escape from family problems. Some people decide that fate sends them the opportunity to start all over again. It can be very difficult to resist the temptation. Especially when hormones are boiling, because with the chosen one there are no shaking knees, a timid voice and wet palms for a long time.

How to distinguish temporary from permanent3

Adultery is an extremely unpleasant thing. If you decide to take such a step, then it is you who will have to find a way out of this situation. Some come home, where they honestly confess to betrayal. For others, it is easier to abstract, pretend that nothing happened. It all depends on the specific case.

If your secret intrigues escalate into more than just sex and talking under the moon, then this is where the most interesting thing happens. It can be difficult to honestly admit to yourself the kind of relationship you want to pursue. On one side of the scales is the stability of family life, on the other, new opportunities and sexual attraction.

This situation requires objectivism and renunciation of fleeting outbursts. Have a heart-to-heart talk with yourself. Determine the vector of development of your personal life. Those relationships that have just begun will not always be so bright. And in family troubles, not everyone knows how to win the right to love.

In reality, it is impossible to relate with the same strong attachment to two at once. You can have different feelings. Let's say you have been friendly to your wife for a long time, she is a dear and close partner. The girlfriend on the side is not always just a sexual object. Perhaps you have finally met the one with whom you will be able to spend your whole life side by side.

Do not rely on advice in solving a difficult problem. No psychologist or best friend can get the big picture. There is an option that at this stage of your life you simply do not want to bond yourself together. This is quite natural. Many people generally put off long-term contacts for later. They need to enjoy the world, people and get different experiences.