Table of contents:
- The wrong environment
- Twice on the same rake2
- Stereotypical thinking3
- Not willingness to take responsibility4
- Low self-esteem5
At the reception of a psychologist with problems in their personal life, not only girls appear, but also representatives of the stronger sex. Communication with them allowed specialists to develop methods for solving some problems, as well as to find out the reasons for their occurrence. The most common problem when a guy has no luck with girls is especially relevant for the modern world. And this is due to certain reasons.
The content of the article
- 1 Wrong environment
- 2 Twice on the same rake
- 3 Stereotypical thinking
- 4 Unwillingness to take responsibility
- 5 Low self-esteem
The wrong environment
If a guy often walks to nightclubs and meets girls there, the probability of meeting the love of his life is reduced to zero. Sociologists from the SuperJob Research Center conducted a survey of 5,000 married men. They were asked where they met their second half. Not a single respondent named the option "in a night club"!
What is the reason for this? There are decent girls in circles where people lead a fairly riotous lifestyle, walk at night and drink, but among them there are rarely those who are aimed at serious, stable relationships. If she goes with her friends a couple of times a month just to dance - that's a completely different matter.
The guy might be advised to look elsewhere for the girl. For example, at a festival of interest, while walking in the park, in a quiet and cozy place.
Twice on the same rake2
Before you understand why you are unlucky in love, you need to analyze all your past relationships. Which girls became lovers? What led to the breakup? It is possible that a young man chooses ladies of a similar nature, but they do not suit him at all. This happens when falling in love appears, but later conflicts arise.
Divorce statistics in Russia show that about 15% of marriages break up precisely because of the incompatibility of characters.
A man needs to understand that by constantly choosing girls who are similar to the previous ones, it will not be possible to achieve maximum understanding, which means that the relationship will not be successful. It is necessary to pay attention to the qualities that the ex lacks, and communicate with those who have them.
Thinking that all women need only money, that they are ready to jump into bed with anyone, etc., the guy does not give himself a chance to meet another girl. Of course, such thoughts do not just appear. Negative experiences in past relationships (or friends' stories, family situations) leave their mark. But this does not mean that everyone has it! Otherwise, happy couples simply would not exist.
The problem is that when he meets a new girl, the guy perceives her through the prism of his experience. He does not automatically believe her, suspecting of impure thoughts and selfish motives. This leads to conflicts that ultimately end in divorce. And this chain can go on forever!
To prevent this from happening, you need to realize that all people are different. And there are really mercantile representatives of the fairer sex, but it is not necessary to establish a relationship with them. A man needs to stop suspecting everyone of lies and just look at her actions, assessing the real picture, and not imposed by his own experience.
Not willingness to take responsibility4
Most often it sounds like this: "Before starting with a girl, I have to earn a million, and also buy a car, a house, apartments for future children …". On the one hand, it seems that this is concern for the future. But in fact, many men are in no hurry to build a serious relationship not for this reason. They are simply afraid of responsibility.
If a good girl appears next to her, ready to survive any crisis with her beloved and generally to live in a hut with a sweetheart, the guy begins to push her away. “Let's wait a while”, “Until the time”, “Don't rush things,” etc. - these are the next excuses of a boy who is afraid of serious intentions. The partner feels it and leaves. And then it seems that the guy just has no luck with the girls.
Appearance problems, speech defects, unfulfilled dreams, and more can lead to an inferiority complex. The guy feels insecure in the company of girls, and if he still achieves one of them, he begins to behave, roughly speaking, like a rag. If he has low self-esteem, he believes that he is not worthy of a good girl. Allows her to do absolutely everything, is afraid to express her opinion, refuses to take the position of a leader or at least an equal in relationships.
This has a negative effect on women - they do not want to bear all the responsibility on themselves.
As a result, due to the complex nature, conflicts appear. If a guy thinks that he is a loser who is not needed by anyone, then situations will happen that only confirm this. Therefore, it is important to develop self-love. You can sign up for the sports section. Early successes in this industry will add confidence. Reading literature on the topic, attending social events, expanding the circle of acquaintances is suitable.
The girls themselves are not always to blame for problems with the fair sex. Sometimes the reasons why a guy is unlucky with girls lie in his own mistakes.