Men And Women Experience Intimacy In Different Positions

Posture, like positioning, conveys a myriad of non-verbal messages. Psychiatry professor Albert Sheflin proposes the concept of "structures". He is convinced that when we interact - we talk, for example, - we "structure" our activity in space and time, positioning ourselves in a certain way.

Albert identifies three types of frames: vis-a-vis, near, completion marker (a signal that communication is over and it's time to return to your business). Perhaps what this concept indicates is the mutual orientation of our shoulders in negotiations. It is interesting that men and women in personal conversations behave in this sense in fundamentally different ways.

When women communicate with each other, they are positioned so as to see each other's faces (as in cases when people of the opposite sex interact). However, they often make eye contact with their interlocutors. They also show more spontaneity, according to Deborah Tannen - leaning forward, nodding, smiling and touching.

Men, on the other hand, tend to stand side by side during a confidential conversation. They avoid prolonged eye contact and are more likely to non-verbally signal strength, power, and independence. They are also less likely to engage in spontaneous conversations with other members of the same gender. For them, eye contact often means a challenge.

Sociologist Harry Brod believes that the shoulder-to-shoulder orientation is the way to experience male emotional closeness. “A number of studies have found that for males, mutual trust is expressed in a position next to each other, and for females, on the contrary. Men inherit the concept of intimacy from competitive practices, where they seem to be playing on the same team,”he sums up.