Table of contents:
- Cheating cements relationships
- Wife doesn't want sex or doesn't satisfy man in bed2
- Men Can't Control Their Desires3
- Too early marriage4
- Divorce is too hard5
- It was just a momentary weakness
Video: Men Reveal 6 Reasons Why They Cheat
2023 Author: Miles Ford | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-08-25 09:40
Cheating on a loved one is a hard blow for any, even the most strong relationship. Most of all it is offensive when a man cheats. After all, he is a support for the whole family, a protector and a breadwinner. Women who play the role of housewives and raise children have no one else to hope for in their lives, with the exception of some relatives.
The content of the article
- 1 Cheating cements relationships
- 2 The wife does not want sex or does not satisfy the man in bed
- 3 Men cannot control their desires
- 4 Too early marriage
- 5 Divorce is too hard
- 6 It was just a momentary weakness
Why do men cheat in an already strong and long-term marital relationship? After all, this is often a surprise, especially if there are almost no problems and disagreements in the family.
Several sociological surveys were conducted among married and single men, the purpose of which was to find out the real reasons for the betrayal on their part. Some in particular have shared their motives for this unpleasant and dangerous act for the relationship.
But in fact, the reasons for male betrayal only in some cases differ from female ones. Basically, they are committed under the influence of family problems and the hard life of men in Russia.
Cheating cements relationships
The most common reason why men decide to have sex on the side is the weakening of the importance of family life. Over the long years of marriage, all the feelings that initially brought two people together often disappear. The marriage itself turns into something like a job, where everyone performs the duties assigned to him, without having special feelings for them.
Dullness, boredom, monotony and depression begin to reign in relationships. Both spouses understand the situation, but they cannot do anything about it and the situation is gradually deteriorating. But if a man cheats with another woman, receiving a charge of pleasure, joy and happiness, then he returns home and shares this joy with others. In some cases, according to the assurances of the respondents, it is betrayal that strengthens and saves the relationship from collapse.
Here is what one of the respondents named Maxim says about this:
“It's rare to find a relationship in which feelings do not fade away. All my acquaintances live together simply by inertia, as, in fact, I do. Home, work, home. Jogging in the morning, a couple of hours in the "Tanks" in the evening. Before starting to change, I felt that everything was slowly going to hell. My wife didn't seem to notice me, she did everything on the machine, everything that we talked about was everyday problems.
But then one day I did it, I changed it, and at the same time did not feel any remorse. I came home with a smile and my wife, seeing me, also smiled. First time in recent months. I don’t blame her that she stopped loving me, I’m also good in this regard. But this does not mean that the family should collapse due to a lack of feelings. And so everything began to improve with us."
Wife doesn't want sex or doesn't satisfy man in bed2
It so happens that a man is simply unhappy with his woman in an intimate sense. This can be due to various reasons. There may not be the necessary level of trust between spouses and a man cannot realize his most desirable fantasies with his wife. Or a woman is too busy looking after the house, taking care of children or work, and she simply does not have the strength to have sex.
Or, over the years of the relationship, the man has ceased to be sexually attractive to her and the wife no longer wants sex. In this case, the man experiences an acute lack of physical intimacy, which leads to a deterioration in his mood, well-being and can cause depression. In this case, he can easily decide to cheat, constantly reminding himself that his wife still does not want or cannot satisfy.
Andrey, one of the survey participants, told the following story:
“You are asking why men cheat? Most of us simply lack the sex that we get from a spouse. My wife and I have the exact same problem, and we have discussed it many times. We both know we need to work on our relationship so that it lasts as long as possible. But if I'm ready to give all the best both at work and in bed, then she is not ready. But I am pleased to communicate with her, she continues to take care of me, but we are not doing well with sex.
What else can I do? Masturbate? I found myself a girl who, apparently, also lacks sex, and we periodically meet just for one night. I don't think this is serious or bad. This is necessary so that my roof does not go. And so I come back healthy and happy, and my worries about the lack of sex simply do not affect my relationship with my wife and children."
And how to return passion to a relationship when there is no sex with your wife, read further on the link.
Men Can't Control Their Desires3
Some representatives of the strong part of the world's population are not able to resist their natural polygamous inclinations. This is the most common, according to the public, the reason for male cheating. Moreover, men themselves are confident that nature itself tells them to change partners for sex as often as they want.
Because of this, betrayal can happen even with the participation of those men who were not predisposed to them before they accepted this stereotype. It is also a way for many men to assert themselves and build self-confidence. A large number of partners is an indicator that a guy can interest almost any girl.
Even having a permanent relationship is not able to prevent such people from showing their natural inclinations for a long time. Someone thinks that this is normal, someone - that it is unacceptable. But the fact is, men often cheat precisely because one partner is not enough for them.
One of the respondents, Alexander, told how it happened to him:
“I cheated on my girls all my life. Apparently, that's the kind of person I am. I have always been told that I give in too much to my emotions, and this is actually the case. But everything changed for a while when I got married. I decided for myself that I love my wife very much and would never cheat on her, no matter how much I wanted. I held out in this regime for almost four years. After that I fell through. Being only with her was morally difficult for me.
I was not particularly interested in having sex with her, she suffered from it. But as soon as I slept with the other, I immediately returned my passion for my wife. I would like to be in a relationship in which I could sleep with any woman. I do not perceive cheating just for the sake of sex as something bad. Thanks to the fact that I sleep with several girls, my sex life with my wife has returned to normal."
Too early marriage4
Early formation of relationships is one of the most common reasons for cheating among both men and women in Russia. Because marriage can solve many financial, housing and other problems, people use it to make their lives easier. Or young people are too much carried away by new feelings for them that they have taken falling in love as a reason to link their lives into a real family as soon as possible.
As it is not difficult to guess, such a relationship is not able to last long enough, and sooner or later one of the spouses will surely think that he limited his freedom too early, because he has not yet tried everything "interesting". Didn't walk up, as they say.
There is nothing surprising in such betrayals. It is rare to find relationships in our time that began at school or student, and continue for at least 10-15 years.
Artyom went through such a relationship and shared his experience during a sociological survey:
“A lot of relationships start on time. But few of them last long. But I thought I was special. And my girl is special. And everything will be strong and durable. But in the end, after two years, I realized that we had changed. Not that feelings have cooled. But she became a different person. And I loved the one I met two years ago. Gradually, we moved away from each other, and because I met a new friend, I decided to cheat on her.
My wife found out about this after a couple of months of our constant meetings with his mistress, and reacted rather coldly to this. As it turned out later, she also cheated on me. I grew up and realized that this is a completely natural outcome for such a relationship. There was no need to follow the lead of youthful love."
Divorce is too hard5
Many men interviewed by sociologists realize that their marital relationship has become obsolete. There are no past feelings, passion, interest. It would seem that it is necessary to disperse and follow different paths. But the process of breaking up a relationship, especially if it lasted several years, is too difficult. There are a lot of moral, financial and legal problems. This can lead to the fact that one of the spouses will be limited in communication with their children.
Or he will need to lose a considerable share of his property. Also, representatives of the male population may worry about the reputation that they will have after leaving the relationship. At the same time, the prospect of being caught with a mistress for some reason scares them less. It is much easier for men to periodically meet with a "left" girl and maintain their current relationship than to clean up the consequences of their breakup.
The opinion of one of the survey participants, Victor, on this topic:
“I have lived with my wife for almost twenty years. We had a normal relationship. Children, home, work. Now I feel that she began to move away from me. She has her own interests, she is not very willing to communicate with me about her affairs. We don't have dinner together. Of course, this is unpleasant. But where to go? I cannot leave my family. If my feelings for my wife have weakened, then I still love my children very much.
Divorce can take away from me the opportunity to communicate with them as freely as I do now. I do not need this. We sometimes meet with our mistress and just sleep. I keep her at a distance, she doesn't pretend to be anything, because she is in about the same situation. All my risks are reflected in her. And I do not plan to leave my wife, this will significantly affect the lives of our children. I don’t want them to think that I left them.”
It was just a momentary weakness
Not all infidelities are prolonged meetings between a married man and a mistress. Sex often happens under random circumstances, which can be a huge number. Moreover, such a betrayal will not pose a danger to the relationship. When do such betrayals take place? Primarily under the influence of alcohol.
At a party, birthday, picnic or in a nightclub, a person can easily get too drunk and succumb to the fleeting desire "to take that beautiful blonde right in the nearest toilet". Or a man is alone for too long due to business trips or other trips in which he cannot take his spouse. And at some point, he meets a colleague who also suffers from loneliness.
One-off sex without commitment doesn't hurt either of them, and both partners understand this. Therefore, this betrayal takes place. Blame your man because of his mistakes, the influence of circumstances or negligence, of course, you can. But such a betrayal does not pose a serious danger to the relationship, unless, of course, it is inflated to the scale of a huge problem.
Daniel, one of the study participants, described how he committed such a betrayal:
“For work, I had to go to the USA for about a month. For a long time I was sad without my wife, because I love her very much. And one of my colleagues from another country had the same feeling. In one evening we decided: "Why not?" We slept. In the morning everything was as usual.
Nobody talked about anything, but I felt terrible for succumbing to this feeling. But my wife forgave me when I told her about it. She said that if I really care about it, it really was a short-term weakness and a mistake. All people are wrong. Why should I be an exception in this matter?"
As you can see from the answers of the respondents, any betrayal has its reasons. If a woman suspects adultery, then she should not immediately blame her husband for everything. After all, he does this only because he lacks something at home. You need to look at yourself and understand what exactly does not suit your spouse.
Although sometimes there are situations when cheating on the part of a man is not the result of family problems or his wife's shortcomings, but simply the result of their unpleasant nature and misperception of the relationship.
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