Why Do Men Marry Without Thinking: Where Does Youth Go?

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Why Do Men Marry Without Thinking: Where Does Youth Go?
Why Do Men Marry Without Thinking: Where Does Youth Go?

Video: Why Do Men Marry Without Thinking: Where Does Youth Go?

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Video: Advice for Men Questioning Marriage | Jordan B Peterson 2023, January

In the old days, parents arranged the fate of their children: they selected wives and husbands for them and organized alliances in this way. These eras have passed. Fortunately or unfortunately, it is not for us to judge - we did not live at that time, so we do not know what it is to marry or marry a person whom you see for the first time.

The content of the article

  • 1 Mom is expecting grandchildren and granddaughters
  • 2 "Bad" example is contagious
  • 3 To evil ex-girlfriend
  • 4 And who will need you in 10 years?
  • 5 Fear of offending your girlfriend and not living up to expectations
  • 6 Marriage as a way to get serious

Nevertheless, the issue of marriage is still quite acute today. Someone manages to meet that one and offer her his hand, heart and other delights, and someone gets married … well, because it happened. Is it good or bad - let's try to figure it out, and also understand how men come to a thoughtless wedding? And what are the reasons pushing them to take such a rash step?

It is also worth knowing about how old to marry. About this and not only, find out in our article further on the link.

Mom is waiting for her grandchildren and granddaughters

Many of our actions are imposed on us by society and its concepts of what is bad and what is good. And if this is not just a society, but your family? It is one thing to protect yourself from public opinion, it is quite another thing to regularly hear complaints or claims at home.

When parents passionately desire to babysit their grandchildren, and a negligent son still hesitates and looks for that one, heavy artillery is used. Mom or dad, and sometimes together for a couple, they begin to take out the brain or appeal to your pity: they say, we won't wait for grandchildren.

More than one thousand marriages took place under such oppression. A decent son feels sorry for his parents, or he finally gets tired of this family drama and finds no other way out but to start a family. Is it worth talking about love here? The answer is probably obvious. The main thing is that the girl is pretty, and even better - and economic immediately. And that's all. There are no more requirements.

Alliances made, so to speak, with parental "permission" are initially doomed to failure. Perhaps a miracle: in a mad rush to please his parents - the prince still finds his princess. But how many people believe in fairy tales?

As a result of such a relationship - an eternal misunderstanding of each other. Who is to blame? Parents? Or a weak-willed groom? Before deciding to please your beloved family, think about the cost.

Why do men marry without thinking
Why do men marry without thinking

A "bad" example is contagious2

Everyone around is getting married, and what am I worse? In addition, there is a constant dilemma in my head: with whom of my friends to spend time, after all, all wives have and they have no time for you! And lo and behold! There is an exit. We need to start a family and stop being a black sheep in the eyes of our married comrades. And leisure will always be with whom to while away. Well, genius? And on the face of dampness of views and youthful childishness in relation to the wedding.

Dependent men from other people's opinions also fall into this category. Oh, this public, be it not okay! When, on a regular basis, you are told that Aunt Tanya's son is great and married at the age of 20, unlike you, a 30-year-old man, then some of them break the bar. And even if this son of Aunt Tanya got married successfully and is happy in his huge family. Whether you want or not, restless thoughts will begin to prevail. Stop. And who said that this son of Aunt Tanya is really happy? Maybe the poor fellow has regretted the wedding a thousand times.

So don't repeat his mistakes. Think first of all with your head. Do not project someone else's personal life, even if it is happy and successful, on yourself: even if everyone around you gets married and claims that this is manna from heaven, believe only yourself. Until you are ready to take on marriage obligations and are not yet sure of your feelings, then do not dare to take a rash step.

Evil ex-girlfriend3

Alas, sometimes guys are going through a hard break in relations: someone is trying to return them in all possible ways, someone starts to hate their former passion, and someone decides to take revenge. Guess how? Yes, by marrying another and showing everyone, and most importantly his past love, that he is completely happy without her.

Why do men get married
Why do men get married

What do we get in the end? Marriage in a hurry (after all, everything must be done as quickly as possible, so that God forbid, the ex-girlfriend herself does not marry faster than we are happy), the bride is completely alien and unfamiliar and certainly unloved. What do we expect from such a union? Words are superfluous …

Who will need you in 10 years? ___ 10

This is just the scourge of the modern generation. I have to go, then it will be too late - this is the main argument. Everyone understands that the years go by, but is this a reason to agree to any relationship simply because you may not have time? The silly and disappointing reality lies behind such an act.

What does our age mean in the end? Another step in development. And if you didn't meet a girl at 25, for the sake of which you were ready to put the whole world at her feet and could keep yourself from knowingly sad life together, then stepping on this rake at 30 will be completely meaningless. You've grown up like? If you are still single, then there are reasons for this.

A happy meeting and a meaningful marriage can happen at any age. Maybe it’s just bad luck and it’s worth changing your social circle, changing your behavior or attitude towards girls. The price for an ill-considered marriage can be very high.

Fear of offending your girlfriend and not living up to expectations4

Girls who are ready for a wedding at any cost are very common. They have even more complexes and problems than guys on this topic. There are young ladies who are not timid, who prefer to act impudently: marry me, period.

Why a man can marry without thinking
Why a man can marry without thinking

A wedding for fear of offending a partner or a banal inability to say no is unlikely to make you a good husband. Important masculine qualities are the ability to make decisions and set priorities. Ideally, you need to have both. If you do not have these important traits, then you still grow up and mature. What kind of head of the family will you make? You cannot be led by someone's desires and provocations. For every argument of your companion, you should have an answer and your own opinion. And if, for some reason, you are not ready to become her husband, you do not need to play around, let alone agree.

Marriage of convenience

Everyone around is talking about mercantile young ladies, but modern guys are also not a mistake. The future dad of the chosen one with money and a jeep? Quite a good game. Only now you don't live with her dad. Besides, where are the guarantees that all the family benefits will go to you so cunning? What if the chosen one's family collapses and goes bankrupt?

In general, gigolos in the male world are a shameful and taboo topic. If this does not stop you, you should think about this: even if the dad of the chosen one is a successful businessman, it means that he is not very simple and very intelligent. What will happen if he sees through the insidious plan? It doesn't matter, before or after the wedding. It will take it, and it will fix you properly. Where to run from the almighty father-in-law? And if he is still from the dashing 90s, then in general trouble. Think, please. A man is a breadwinner and head of a family, he a priori knows how to make money. If today this is not about you, then direct all your energy from marriage, calculated on ways to make good money. With your desire, you will succeed!

Why does a man decide to marry without thinking
Why does a man decide to marry without thinking

Marriage as a way to get serious5

Here dear friend is generally a dead end. If up to 30 you have not matured and grown wiser on your own, then no amount of marriage will help. It is generally categorically contraindicated with such goals and thoughts. Many things do not depend at all on the presence of a girl or a stamp in the passport. Career growth, professionalism, material wealth, self-confidence - these are acquired qualities that are acquired with experience, years and thanks to the efforts made. No woman will make you more serious and will not make you wiser.

Of course, it happens that, having met a certain woman, a man begins to move mountains and overcome obstacles that he was afraid to look at before. But the key idea here is to meet a certain woman, that is, your beloved, the only one. Because not hefty male forces appear only with the arrival of the one for which you put the whole world at her feet.

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