Acquaintance With The Girl's Parents. Tips On How To Behave And How To Please

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Acquaintance With The Girl's Parents. Tips On How To Behave And How To Please
Acquaintance With The Girl's Parents. Tips On How To Behave And How To Please

Video: Acquaintance With The Girl's Parents. Tips On How To Behave And How To Please

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Video: 8 Ways to Improve Parent Child Relationship 2023, January
Meet the parents
Meet the parents

Sooner or later, everyone will come to this day: meeting the girl's parents. It's scary, exciting, awkward and inevitable. But this is necessary. In order not to make a mistake, you should be well prepared.

The content of the article

  • 1 Why is this necessary?
  • 2 How to prepare for this
  • 3 What to wear
  • 4 Meet the girl's parents: x hour
  • 5 What to talk about?

Why bother? I

First you need to understand whether the relationship with this girl is really serious enough and both of the couple want to continue it. Young people are divided into two types: the first think that it is not obligatory, the second take it too seriously.

And if in the first case the acquaintance process will proceed easily, since the young man will not be nervous, then with the second case, the situation is more complicated.

If a couple wants to move to a new level of relationship, then getting to know their parents is a must. It will be useful specifically for the guy. He will be able to look at the girl's mother and understand what awaits him in twenty years. And having met his father, it will become clearer to him what model of behavior the girl expects from him.

In addition, for many girls, the opinion of their parents means a lot, if not everything. So, getting to know the parents, first of all, will show the girl that the young man is not indifferent to her and he is ready to go further hand in hand with her.

Men understand this, so the meeting becomes a serious test for them. But in reality, everything is not so scary. Do not forget that once the parents were themselves in the place of a young couple, which means that there is no need to learn the rules of etiquette by heart and pretend to be someone you are not. In addition, you need to remember that later the parents will see what the young man really is, so you should not show yourself to another, ideal person.

How to prepare for it2

If, after all, the desire to make a positive impression is very strong, it is worth taking preparatory measures. You should find out what her parents are interested in, how they spend their leisure time, what hobbies I have. In the case of mom, you can ask what dish she considers her crown, because, most likely, she will put it on the table. Before communicating with the father, you need to find out from the girl what kind of communication between them and how much he takes care of her.

Meet the girl's parents
Meet the girl's parents

And information about hobbies and usual pastime will help to avoid awkward pauses during a conversation and always provide topics for questions.

To make a good impression, you shouldn't come into the house empty-handed. This, at least, is not very decent. The main thing is not to go too far with the choice of a gift. It should be something in the middle price range, but not capture the hobbies of the parents, otherwise the gift will seem inappropriate. The ideal option would be to grab a cake or candy to the table, as well as a bottle of good wine. If the girl's parents do not accept alcohol at home, it can be replaced with elite tea or coffee.

It is not worth giving gifts in the form of perfumes, accessories, clothing items and so on at the first meeting, otherwise the acquaintance will become more like a ransom.

What to wear3

In Russia, despite the struggle with this, they are still greeted by their clothes. Therefore, the choice of clothing in this case plays an important role. This does not mean that you must definitely put on a tailcoat and lick your hair with gel. This means that the appearance must be neat and tidy. Clothes should not be dirty, wrinkled, or smelly. It is advisable to avoid aggressive or overly bright prints, chains and ripped jeans.

about meeting the girl's parents
about meeting the girl's parents

Of course, if meeting the girl's parents involves meeting bikers, you can wear a leather jacket and jeans. You need to be guided by the situation and lifestyle of the family. Most likely, it will be a classic couple with well-established moral principles and the complete collection of Pushkin's works. So you need to dress appropriately. The ideal option would be classic jeans or trousers, combined with a shirt, jumper or, in extreme cases, a very laconic T-shirt. The best choice is casual style.

Special attention should be paid to the hairstyle. Hair should be clean and well combed. You don’t have to get a cool haircut from the most expensive barber in town, but it’s necessary to style them in something decent.

Also, the young man should not smell unpleasant. But with the harsh aromas of perfumes, you shouldn't go overboard either. And of course, the general condition must be satisfactory. Few people enjoy meeting a guy with a hangover or after submitting an annual report.

Meet the girl's parents: hour x4

So, a couple is standing at the doorstep and is about to press the bell button. What to do next and how to behave? Do not panic, there are a number of stages in the dating process that everyone expects and which will save the day.

To begin with, entering the house, it is worth, of course, to say hello. Shake my father's hand, smile at my mother. Be sure to introduce yourself and, most importantly, remember the names of the parents.

meet the girl's parents
meet the girl's parents

And here it is not just about their names, but about the form of address that they will voice. These are good form rules - to address people as they introduced themselves. If they gave a name and patronymic, it is worth calling them just that. If only the name was said - well, it will be even easier.

You can't walk awkwardly on the doorstep, spreading dirt from the street, but you shouldn't also stand until they tell you what to do. Having greeted and handed over the gifts, be sure to ask where the bathroom is and go to wash your hands. And then go where the hosts invite.

It is good practice to ask where you can sit. Usually hospitable hostesses think over even such trifles. Sitting at the table, you should not immediately pounce on food, it is better to wait until the girl's parents touch it. You need to be courteous at the table, monitor the filling of glasses or glasses, offer to transfer a dish that is far away.

The rules of etiquette must be observed at the table. They are very simple - do not make unpleasant sounds while eating, do not speak with your mouth full, use the offered cutlery and do not put your elbows on the table. Of course, rarely does anyone care about the last rule. Nevertheless, it will definitely be noted by the girl's mother as positive, characterizing the guy as a well-mannered person.

In general, mom is the main person at this evening. No matter how respectfully he treats the girl, no matter how much his father falls in love with him, no matter how fun his younger brothers and sisters play with him, if his mother doesn't like him, then no one will like him.

what to expect from meeting parents
what to expect from meeting parents

It is the mother who is the person in the family who has the maximum influence on the girl. A couple of her not the most positive assessments of a young man will become a serious reason for her to think about a relationship. Therefore, all attention and all charms should be thrown on mom. Her dishes are the most delicious, her daughter is probably beautiful herself, her house is the most comfortable and stuff like that. The main thing is that this gross flattery looks as natural as possible. It will be helpful to help mom clean the dishes after dinner and thank her for the delicious food.

What to talk about? 5

It is worth preparing in advance for what the conversations will be about at the table. And so, what parents will ask about:

  • They will ask about how the couple met. If the story of your acquaintance sounds like "I brought her drunk from the bar," then it is better to come up with a beautiful legend in advance. Of course, it's not good to lie. Therefore, you can embellish a little. “I was driving after a hard day's work, there was a heavy downpour on the street, and suddenly I saw her waiting for the bus, all wet and tired, and decided to give her a lift.” The main thing is that both heroes of this story tell the same thing.
  • About what are the general plans for the future. No family expects to be met by a young man who has no serious intentions towards their daughter. Therefore, of course, they will be interested in whether the couple is going to live together, get married and have children. You just need to reconcile and decide what plan the young couple has, and they will voice it at a family meeting.
scared to meet the girl's parents
scared to meet the girl's parents
  • In general, the topic of the family, in principle, will be raised quite a lot. It is interesting to know what kind of family the young man has. It is clear that very few people will spread the truth right away. Nevertheless, it will already be possible to draw some conclusions from the young man's reaction to such questions. They may also ask about family values ​​in general to understand what kind of family the parents give their daughter to.
  • About what the young man does. Does he study, if yes, then for whom, what successes and does he see his career in this direction. If he works, then what does he do, what prospects, how much time he devotes to work.
  • And of course, parents will want to know about their hobbies and how the young man spends his free time. Does he go in for sports, does he like outdoor recreation, how often he travels.

Along with this, there are topics that should not be raised under any circumstances:

  • Don't tell negative stories about yourself. Even if now they seem like just funny accidents, for the girl's parents they may look different.
  • You can't bring up the topic of religion and faith. These are very sensitive questions, very intimate. In order not to provoke a heated religious dispute, it is better to avoid such things.
  • The question of money is also irrelevant. By the way, it is never appropriate. Only with close people. If parents are interested in a young person's earnings, general phrases can be dispensed with. For example, to say that a young person will be able to take over the provision of a family. Or that while he is studying, but in the future he plans to build a career.
how to behave when meeting parents
how to behave when meeting parents
  • By the way, politics is also a stop topic. People have very different political views, especially young people. But the adult generation is somewhat conservative and receives most of the information through television and radio. If you start talking about your attitude to politics, you can stumble upon a wall of misunderstanding, and a pleasant evening will quickly end.
  • Don't talk about the shortcomings of your own family. Even if these are not shortcomings, but simply temporary difficulties. Until the parents get to know the young man well enough, such stories can create the image of a little-known person with any life burdens. It is clear that everyone has them, but it is better to postpone such stories for later.
  • Also, do not gossip and discuss acquaintances, give them and their actions a personal assessment. This will only create the impression that as soon as the couple leaves their father's house, they will immediately begin to discuss their parents. Or worse, the young man might be discussing the girl behind her.

Simple rules of etiquette will add additional advantages to the image of the ideal guy:

  • Contact "you", if not suggested otherwise
  • Do not interrupt
  • Listen carefully to the interlocutor
  • Introduce yourself without forcing your parents to interrogate
how to dress for meeting parents
how to dress for meeting parents
  • At the same time, be interested in their life equally, without pulling the blanket over yourself
  • Eliminate swear words and parasitic words in speech
  • And also exclude sarcasm, irony and inappropriate jokes
  • Smile and be charming

In general, getting to know the girl's parents is not a super difficult task. If humility, tact, and sociability are innate, then don't worry. It is important to remember that the main thing for parents is to find out who the young person really is. And sooner or later they will find out. So there is no point in lying about your biography or plans, because this can turn into problems.

Do not think that cunning and resourcefulness will somehow help. Parents are people too, and they also found themselves in such a situation. They remember how exciting it is. This means that they themselves will try to make communication pleasant. In addition, for them this situation, most likely, is also the first time. And they will also be nervous, speak out of place and laugh awkwardly.

And even more so, this situation is quite stressful, first of all, for the girl. And for her sake, everyone is here, so her comfort should come first.

At the end of the meeting, it is worth thanking the parents for a pleasant evening, saying that the food was very tasty and the communication was pleasant. And if the couple lives together, it would be good form to invite them on a mutual visit.

first meeting with the girl's parents
first meeting with the girl's parents

Bonus - recommendations on how to get through meeting a guy's parents in our next article.

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