Is There Friendship Between Women Or Does Not Exist - Let's Figure It Out In Psychology

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Is There Friendship Between Women Or Does Not Exist - Let's Figure It Out In Psychology
Is There Friendship Between Women Or Does Not Exist - Let's Figure It Out In Psychology

Video: Is There Friendship Between Women Or Does Not Exist - Let's Figure It Out In Psychology

Video: Is There Friendship Between Women Or Does Not Exist - Let's Figure It Out In Psychology
Video: Keeping Friendships Platonic and Healthy 2023, March
Friendship between women
Friendship between women

Does female friendship really exist, or are women inherently always rivals? Can they truly be friends with each other? How strong can their emotional connection be? How long does friendship between women last and does it exist as a phenomenon?

The content of the article

  • 1 There is always one "but"
  • 2 The beginning of a friendship
  • 3 Why are we friends?
  • 4 Competition
  • 5 Emotional fullness of friendship
  • 6 Women's friendship from the perspective of men
  • 7 "No" to female friendship!

The question of female friendship is perhaps the most controversial. Millions of women around the world confidently declare that friendship between two beautiful young ladies is simply impossible. At that time, the rest of the girls are absolutely sure that there are two or three people in their environment whom they can safely call friends. And that means - female friendship!

There is an opinion that girlish friendship defies any explanation, just like women's logic. But in spite of everything, friendship does not depend on gender - it either is or it is not. Betrayal, lack of support and understanding, deception exists regardless of whether you are female or male.

There is always one "but" __ 171187

  • friendship originated in kindergarten or at school;
  • friendships do not interfere with family life;
  • the boundaries of excessive trust are not violated;
  • one of the friends does not regularly load the other with her problems and failures;
  • if two women have the same character and similar outlook on life;
  • there is "against whom to be friends."

Psychologists regularly analyze the issue of female friendship from different angles and came to the conclusion that it can still exist. And there are really many such examples. So, friendship between women can be if:

The beginning of a friendship

It often happens that the friendship that originated in school simply dissolves in time in the future. And here there is no fault of the women themselves, all the fault is the time and circumstances. For example, there are two girls - Katya and Tanya. Until the 11th grade, they shared all the troubles and joys for two, discussed the guys and gave each other advice, shared the most intimate secrets. It seemed that this friendship would last forever.

But the graduation died down, the girls entered different universities and left for different cities. Communication became less and less frequent, and soon the friends limited themselves to only rare phone calls. And now several years have passed and the girls nevertheless decided to meet. But instead of a friend, each of them met a completely alien person.

facts about friendship between girls
facts about friendship between girls

In such situations, very often both girls begin to feel guilty about the fact that the emotional connection is lost. And in order to rectify the situation, both of them or one of them imitate this very connection and the obligation to “be friends” further. Views on life and certain things, priorities, interests and tastes change over time, but a sense of duty from that old life makes them imitate friendship further. And each of them can confidently think that she has a girlfriend, but in reality this is completely wrong. According to this scheme, many girls and "are friends" with each other.

Or, for example, another case. All the same Katya and Tanya. Katya always resorted to help at the first request of Tanya, substituted her fragile shoulder when another guy threw her friend, they could talk for hours on end until morning and help each other out in difficult times. And then again time passes, each began his own life. But it is precisely this burden of responsibility that weighs on the shoulders of both, and it makes them rarely, but nevertheless, meet in a cafe for a cup of tea.

The first half hour for conversation there are interesting topics, but time passes and silence sets in - after all, there is nothing to talk about. Both have different interests, sometime common problems are no longer interested, but the feeling of "friendship" obliges them to meet for an hour or two for a boring conversation.

For what reason do women often pull this burden from the past and the "duty to be friends" for a long time? Friendship between women can last for years, even if one of the girls does not need it. The priority in such relationships becomes a certain benefit or personal motives. For example:

myths about female friendship
myths about female friendship
  • some girls are "friends" with each other for convenient leisure planning - go to the gym, cafe, in general, any public places together, thus overcoming social discomfort;
  • some in so-called friendship can afford to relax and just be themselves, taking off the mask of the ideal wife or office worker;
  • new mothers deserve special attention, who, in the desire to escape from domestic captivity, simply find themselves a companion and "free ears" to just talk or talk about painful things;
  • other women maintain friendship for a certain time until they establish a personal life. As soon as a seductive stranger appears on the horizon, friendship simply dissolves into thin air.

Why are we friends? 2

By what criteria do we like a certain type of people? Perhaps by type, interests, lifestyle, views? Women do the same, choosing friends for themselves according to common interests - for example, swimming, drawing, the gym, mothers on maternity leave, mutual acquaintances, special courses, etc. At the same time, if suddenly the sphere of hobby changes for one of the girlfriends, common interests disappear.

facts about female friendship
facts about female friendship

Thus, it turns out that, in principle, the friends had nothing in common. What kind of friendship can we talk about in this case? Psychologists say that the strongest friendship between women can arise during the student years. After all, it was at this time that the personality is fully formed and each of the friends is open to something new.

Failures in studies, sessions, relationships with classmates are experienced together. Women who started their acquaintance at this particular time, as a rule, can carry on sincere friendship through many years.

By their nature, girls are more emotional than representatives of the strong half of humanity. That is why women are more often emotionally attached to their own kind. The essence of this relationship is mutual return and the need for attention, which is given in full by both parties. Even in childhood, they subconsciously go to contact with other girls and do not try to find benefits.

With age, the personality is formed, and personal interests come to the fore. Since a sense of responsibility has not yet been developed, many girls are ready to neglect communication and friendship in order to obtain some benefit. Based on this scheme, a stereotype appeared that there is no friendship between women.


Another reason women cannot be friends is competition. From childhood, girls develop a certain trait to be better. than a neighbor on a desk or a daughter of a mother's friend.

about friendship between women
about friendship between women

Already in adulthood, a woman develops the female instinct, when a priori she must be the best in order to be close to a courageous male. Which, in turn, will provide her with safety and procreation.

Competition can disappear only at the moment when girlfriends or just acquaintances girls have reached a certain social status, material wealth, both have successfully married and live happily, they are completely satisfied with life. In this case, they simply have nothing to compete in, and sincere friendship can last quite a long time.

But even at a young age, when the formation of personality is actively going on, one can say that close friends often collide with their heads, as they are trying to reach certain heights and prove their success to a friend. How often can you hear stories that two girlfriends claimed the same man. After all, their social circle, as a rule, is common. And when the guy made his choice in favor of one of his friends, there was no trace of friendship. Was she even there?

Emotional fullness of friendship4

Nature has given a woman the ability to deeply emotionally immerse herself in any exciting issue. For women, between whom there is friendship, communication is always filled with feelings and emotions. It is surprising that the main component of female friendship is not a solution to a specific issue, but a desire to discuss.

Friendship between women
Friendship between women

It is very important for any woman to be heard and receive support in the person of the interlocutor. Unlike male heart-to-heart conversations, female communication has a pronounced emotional overtones. In communicating with her friend, a woman develops a trusting relationship and, above all, wants to see reciprocity.

Any friendship between two women can be compared to a tandem in which one person takes a leading position and often gives instructions and teachings. If the roles do not change, such a friendship can last for quite some time. If one of the girls decides to take on the role of a friend, there is a great risk of conflict and internal resentment. For the birth of female friendship, as well as for its termination, a random word, any act, refusal or request for help, etc., can serve.

Also, a common reason for a quarrel between girlfriends may be unsaid news about something, even if not important. In this case, a complex of uselessness develops. Such cases often end with the complete disregard of one of the other friends, and without any explanation.

Women are by nature terrible owners, and this rule applies not only to relationships with men, but also to friendships with girlfriends. If two girls secretly consider themselves friends and suddenly one of them does not invite the other to the company or prefers another communication, the resentment of the other is inevitable.

It sounds strange, but often women's conversations are filled with emptiness in terms of the fact that some really significant and global things are not discussed by them. In turn, for the women themselves, a heart-to-heart conversation with a friend can be compared to therapy. Indeed, during a conversation, an emotional release from the accumulated negative occurs.

Friendship between girls
Friendship between girls

From this point of view, friendship between women can be compared to the ability to stabilize your inner state. The desire to share with problems and receive support in return is a certain link and warms up interest in communication between friends.

Women's friendship from the point of view of men5

It is difficult for men to understand female friendship, as the spirit of competition awakens in each participant. By the way, it is men who believe that friendship between women is akin to a bond between a man and a woman, in which there is no sexual connotation.

There are often cases when one of the women likes the appearance and figure of a friend. These emotions are difficult to describe, but their nature is quite similar to sympathy for a man. It happens that a person simply attracts to himself, and this magnetism defies explanation.

Friends do not marry, do not create families (exceptions are same-sex marriages), but their friendship is undoubtedly built on mutual interest, sympathy, respect, support, planning joint leisure activities, and emotional closeness. Moreover, if we compare real female friendship and the average married couple, then in the first case, the manifestation of feelings is much brighter and stronger.

about friendship between girls
about friendship between girls

Friends can meet much less often, but communication is bright and richer in terms of emotions.

"No" to female friendship! 171187

When is there no friendship between women? Since women are by nature very emotional and susceptible to feelings, it is in these feelings that they often get confused. Ask any woman if she has any girlfriends or friends whom they can speak out and entrust their experiences, she will confidently list a couple of colleagues from work or a friend from childhood whom they meet from time to time.

For each of them, it in turn will be a kind of "vest", "free ears" and "strong shoulder". What prevents two women from being friends? First of all, it is envy and personal unfulfillment, hence such feelings as resentment, discussion and betrayal arise. In this case, the girls are on opposite sides of the barricades, and friendship between them is simply not possible. Also, an already established friendship between women can end if one of them feels internal discomfort when communicating with the other.

Any relationship is an exchange of emotions and internal energy. Moreover, both positive and negative. And when, in a desire to receive support, one of her friends does not receive it, claims and grievances begin. Although it is already a mistake to demand support from someone. In this case, friendship becomes "you owe me" and eventually simply ceases to exist.

facts about friendship between women
facts about friendship between women

Our next article will tell about the existence of friendship between men. Follow the link further!

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